Skip to content

no room for hipsters

the occupation of Ashley and Levon

Did you know that we haven’t seen this dramatic increase of unemployment since the end of World War II?  I could give you all the facts you wanted about this type of thing because like I said before, I am a bonafide financial literacy instructor.  Yesterday I was sitting in one of those webex, webinar things where people all watch a powerpoint and talk on a conference call together and the topic was Tough Times/ Tough Choices.  This particular powerpoint had my name on the front page because I helped write it and like I said, I am supposed to understand these sorts of things.  And here I am quitting my job. 

 

Perhaps if it were my goal to quit and rock out in Knoxville it would be better.  I know all the food banks and government programs that I’m sure I’ll need in between gigs.  But no, I’m going to quit and move to New York where you can’t even wait tables because all the investment bankers are waiting tables again instead of leaving exorbitant tips for ridiculous expenditures. 

 

Then I remember that Knoxville doesn’t work for me.  For one, it’s a bluegrass town and I couldn’t even enter a songwriting contest at the Gatlinburg Hard Rock Café because I don’t play an acoustic instrument.  I told them that my piano was just lighter and had to be plugged up but was otherwise acoustic.  They said the contest was called “Cabin Fever” for a reason and my jazz pop stuff would probably get my ass kicked.  Then there’s the fact in Knoxville that I made roughly 10,000 cold calls a while back soliciting life insurance.  I walked around in one of my three suits everyday and pretended like I had to be somewhere or meet someone. 

 

One time I lied to a secretary to get an appointment with a small company’s president.  I went in there with my suitcase and my brochures and started following my training with these bomb proof questions sure to scare him into immediate panic about his estate affairs and complete massive amounts of paperwork with me on the spot.  He politely smiled as soon as he realized why I was there and said he couldn’t answer questions about his net worth or the company’s revenues because that was frankly none of my business.  In sales they teach you how to handle resistance so I said I would send him some stuff in the mail and ran out the door.  Knoxville makes me remember stuff like that.  And too much of Knoxville knows me as this guy. 

Advertisements

%d bloggers like this: